Book review: Sexy but Psycho

This is a review from a contributor who wishes to remain anonymous. The issue of how female victims of domestic abuse are treated in the family justice system is a controversial one. My experiences as a lawyer in the system over 20 years does not support the narrative that I often hear from others, that women’s experiences of violence and abuse are dismissed or actively turned against them. But what is equally clear is that many disagree with me. I am still not clear how we square this circle. Either I am a victim myself of a misogynistic system and simply cannot see the truth as it is played out – or there is a degree of exaggeration by the system’s critics. Presumably the truth, as ever, lies somewhere in between. I cannot deny the number of women who feel very strongly that something is going very badly wrong; here one women gives her history to explain why. I can’t dismiss something simply because it does not chime with my experience or belief – but it is a matter of continuing curiosity and worry to me, how big the gap can be between mine and other women’s experiences.

Sarah Phillimore

“She’s mental “ is currently being played out both in court and in the media in the Heard versus Depp defamation case. What is happening under the gaze of the world, could have been a case study in Dr Jessica Talyor’s latest book.

Amber Heard has been evaluated by the defendant’s witness to have two personality disorders . This is a common diagnosis in family law cases, where there are allegations of intimate partner violence.

The blurb on Sexy but Psycho proclaims “ Angry , opinionated,mouthy,aggressive,hysterical, mad …. Why are women and girls who report violence against them so likely to be diagnosed with personality disorders ? Why are women and girls pathologised for being angry about oppression and abuse ”  Dr Taylor argues ( yes she is angry ) that women are classified by the psychiatric profession as mentally unwell when they in fact are having a normal stress response to trauma. She delves into the historical context, women who did not play the game being labelled as witches or locked up in institutions. Any protesting was seen as further evidence of mental illness. Little girls and grown women it seemed were in the words of the nursery rhyme supposed to be made of “ sugar and spice and all things nice” – woe betide them if they stepped over the line.

The Heard-Depp case proves that this is not just historical, it is happening today. The book includes a chapter titled “ Pathologising women and children in the courtroom” , which starts with the case study of a young mother labeled with emotionally unstable personality disorder and depression after being abused and raped by her partner. He then used the label against her in the courtroom. This may be familiar to many. The woman continued to be labelled for years afterwards as unstable, without the violence she had been a victim of being recorded in her files as well.

I eagerly awaited this book and it did not disappoint. I too, was labelled with a personality disorder by a court appointed psychiatrist after years of intimate partner violence, ignored by the authorities the times I asked for help. I had no previous mental disorders or addictions. The NHS could find nothing to treat when I referred myself to mental health services. My daughters were placed under a care order with my abusive ex partner; his previous offending was ignored.  I was told that my condition was not treatable by the court expert in the timescale for the children. It was unbelievably surreal, but sadly, is not unique. 

Dr Taylor demonstrates that the system is unwell rather than the women.It is misogynistic, created by men to control women. Despite so-called equal rights it still does so. She sets out a plan to change , starting with psychiatric services pathologising and medicating trauma victims. She wants to remove funding from pharmaceutical companies and instead invest that funding in free trauma treatment. She advocates for training for all professionals dealing with women , to understand why the woman may be presenting as she is, a frightened person rather than an unstable person out for revenge /attention …..