Views from a Disabled Parent about getting help and support

 Being disabled doesn’t make you a bad parent.

  • You may feel very worried, or a failure or scared that ss will think you are a bad parent BUT anyone who says you are by definition a bad/ neglectful parent because you are disabled is discriminating against you. It’s not legal to say this.
  • ask for an assessment from adult ss before anything else takes place. You can self refer or ask your GP to refer (GP channels urgent referrals and get you seen quicker).
  • adult ss will send an assessor out to your home to do a thorough assessment of your needs. It’s important to find out your council’s criteria and levels for providing help.
  • after your needs have been assessed adult ss will decide whether you’re entitled to any help. It’s in their interests to score your needs as low as possible, as they are legally bound to provide help if you’re assessed as needing it.
  • its adult ss responsibility to meet your needs as a disabled person in all your roles (personal care, as a parent etc). This could be through direct help (providing council or agency carers), or via direct payments (where you have a budget to spend on your care). Sometimes they may refer you on to other services such as charities and home start organisations.
  • The budget for your care should come from adult ss but could in some circs be topped up by children’s services.
  • the theory is that if your needs are being met as a disabled parent, your child should have no remaining needs unmet. However there are situations where councils agree a shared budget.
  • Do find out very clearly on what grounds you are receiving help. Do not agree that your child is at risk of neglect just because of your disability.